Footprints on the Mountainside

The difficulty I faced in my ALHP has helped me face some needs I have in terms of emotions and insecurities.

Coming back from the programme, it was easy to just let go and return to my old ways of vague, supressed dissatisfactions, but I’m surprising myself with my eagerness to actually deal with my needs and care for myself. I’m trying to be aware of the motivations behind my actions, and seeing patterns in my own behaviour.

Don’t know where this is taking me, but right now, it feels like I’m an onion, with layers and layers and layers. The inner layers also have a greater tendency to bring tears I’m meeting myself for the first time and I like it.

Relationships are very important to me - is a new discovery I’m making. I like to connect with people. Perhaps this is why, rather than have a business website, Wide Aware has this massive informal place with pictures and discussions and articles which will never ever sell anything. I want adventurers to feel comfortable here. I want to connect with people.

Another thing I’m discovering is that I am very fast, and I tend to make people feel pressurised when I expect them to cope at my speed. By fast, I’m not speaking of actions, but of thoughts. It tends to alienate people when I do that, because it makes them feel inferior. It hurts me too, because I want them with me. I am now consciously trying to take my time and be sure that I am actually communicating, rather than assuming that people understand because of familarity, and I find that it is helping me be more connected with them.

There are other things too. I tend to focus intensely on things and tune out all distractions, which makes me lose touch with other things that are happening. I’m trying to maintain regular awareness of things I care about.

That’s it folks for now. Thanks for bearing with this rambling session, but it feels good to admit it, and acknowledge that I am also doing something to make things better. Hopefully, Nirvana is round the corner. Its more likely to be new discoveries round the corner.

There is a dog in our building. He was hurt last week. Quite badly. I tried to help him, but he wouldn’t let me come near. He usually doesn’t allow anyone to come close. He’s a stray.

I called up the folks at Karuna last Friday, after trying for two days unsuccessfully. I was told that they were overloaded with requests and the van couldn’t come before Monday. I waited.

The van came on Monday night. The dog wouldn’t come close and couldn’t be cornered and caught, so the folks had to return. They came again at my request today, and I’m just back after a second unsuccessful round of catch-the-dog.

I feel so angry with the poor dog. After seeing me for over a year, he still doesn’t trust me to come to his aid. Actually, I don’t blame him. A street dog’s life is probably not a honeymoon, but still……

The Karuna guys have seen it all many times. They just asked me to make a fresh request and they could come again on the next day.

For those who don’t know what Karuna is, its an NGO committed to the animal welfare in Mumbai. If you find a horse, dog, bird, cow…. any animal that needs medical attention, or intervention, feel free to bring it to their attention, and they may be overworked, but htey will certainly come. If you have some money to spare, you might also consider donating, so that their overworked service can be extended to come to the aid of many more animals that need it.

As far as I know, they don’t have a website, but you can call them on these numbers (below) to request for services, or express your appreciation for the work they do. God knows we need people like them around. Their staff is working from early in the morning to very late at night, constantly attending to the needs of animals. You make a request, and their ambulance will come around - completely free of cost to help the animal. They care. You can see it in their actions, in their untiring efforts, and their willingness to go the extra mile to hunt for the street dog that suddenly went missing when they arrived to treat it, or even bringing their team of people to help catch it.

Do keep them in mind and keep these numbers safe for the sake of any animal you could end up helping without doing much more than a phone call:

28763856, 28761313

Please keep in mind that for every request, they will need the contact of a person in the area, who can identify the animal and be there with them when they arrive. So if you’re calling about an animal on the highway, it might be worthwhile to speak with a local shop or something and provide their contact, unless you intend to camp there until they arrive.

You can also call them for pets. They don’t charge any money, so don’t hesitate, just be there for an animal that needs it.

Well… our dog needs to wait some more I guess, but another very injured bitch came to notice just as they were leaving and they went there and treated her. So the trip was not a wasted exercise.

Surfing around for stuff to do with the kids on programmes, I came across this great idea. Of course, all the talk about short days in the winter, etc. is not really important to my interests, but what caught my eye is the exploration of the environment and collect materials for creative artistic expression. I can see myself using this idea in a million different ways, now that it has occurred to me.

Getting children to express themselves with materials of their choice is a superb idea to begin with. It will also be interesting to see the different kinds of materials that appeal to them, or get less interactive participants to open up, and express themselves in other ways. It will be a good tool for feedback, where you create and gift others “dolls” of themselves, which express how you see them, or feel about them.

Heh. Why not? I’d happily use this with adults as well. Let’s see where this new whim takes me

Heh. It’s a life long project. I’m 31 now, and I still don’t know what I want to become when I grow up. There are so many passions to indulge in. One life - so much to do. I’m making a note of my most wanted futures for this life time, in an attempt to get them on record. Regulars here know that this is subject to change - of course.

Yeah - so go on - yell at me for infecting your mind with these tempting little dreams and don’t blame me if you want to do these too.

1. I want to develop a small farm. Organic farming is something I am really interested in. I plan to build a spacious home on the property, which I will be using to run programmes in as well. This home is going to be constructed with natural materials. Mostly stone and mud with some wood. Planning to make the property self-sufficient in terms of energy needs. Solar power and bio gas for cooking, heating water, light and electricity. Perhaps wind/water mills for electricity as well. Totally organic produce, which will provide for most of the food requirements of the people living here. Horses and dogs complete the picture of course.
2. I want to become a mahaout and live a wandering life with my own elephant for at least 2 years. I don’t know much about elephants, but I’m a willing and hard worker, not to mention experience with other animals and a sharp brain. I will learn.
3. I want to raise my kid away from the stereotypical city attitude. Living in the city is fine, but there is a whole world to explore, and chips are not the tastiest food on the planet, television and films are not the best source of entertainment, and having fun need not always be noisy. I’d like my child to learn the value of living straight from the heart. The importance of running full power behind dreams that we are sure about. Yeah I know I don’t have a child yet, but that is a matter of time.
4. I want to put my memories on record. I’ve had some incredible experiences in my life, and am constantly advised by friends and family to write a book about them. I will. I don’t know how fascinating it will be, but I dare say its not going to be something that can be put down easily.
5. I want to do something really nice for the environment. It could be in the form of creating awareness of environmentally friendly options and responsibilities in far flung regions, or it could be working in a forest department to help conserve the resources and protect the animals or it could be something I haven’t thought about yet. But I will do it.
6. I want to get people tempted by solar cooking. Its really easy to build a solar cooker and it works to save a lot of money, natural resources, energy and effort. So why not. For those who don’t know, solar cooking uses heat from the sun to cook food. It is slow cooking, so the food doesn’t char and burn, and the utensils are really easy to clean quickly. The slow cooking retains most of the taste of the food and makes it really delicious. You can put food to cook and skip off to do your own thing for a couple of hours without haunting the kitchen or worrying about it boiling over, burning, or setting fire to something. You save electricity / gas / kerosene / wood / whatever you use for cooking. An efficient solar cooker is really cheap and quick to make, so if you need to cook more, you can simply make one or two more cookers. They can store flat and hardly take space when not in use. They can double up as a fridge at night (reversing the cooking process). If it gets old, you throw it out and make a new one, without worrying about the expenses. Tempting - isn’t it?

So much for now, but stay tuned to this page. I’m bound to drop in and make additions and revisions.

This is a memory from a long time ago. Way before I figured out the internet beyond checking mail. This is a time when I was a nomadic horsewoman in the Himalaya.
I was living in the high pastures of the Kullu valley with my herd of horses. We were in the pastures below the Hampta Pass - about a 6 hour walk from Manali. The winter had been rough, and we were just camping out in the high altitude pastures where we leave them for the summers, supplementing their diet with some grain, to help them catch on on their health a bit faster.

What a place to be in! We were camped in the meadows at Juara. Alpine meadows - the air is crisp, the water is crystal clear and flows right through the pasture. A few empty stone structures that would later become nomadic tea stalls plus camps of herb gatherers dotted the scene, with sheer black cliffs rising on both sides in stark contrast with the lush comfort of the place. A place straight from some fantasy tale. Once could believe some nature spirits living here, particularly on moonlit nights, when the scene goes black and white, with the moonlight strong enough in places to register come colour. What a life - the horses living free around me, prancing with their improving condition. Pye, my bitch, by my side and the sounds of the stream for company.

The days were pretty idle. Feeding the horses a couple of times a day was no pain - they used to come happily enough for the treat. Beyond that…. not much to do. Cooking, enjoying the paradise I was living in, early to bed, early to rise. Perhaps an occasional visit to Sethan - the last village on this route, and the only fully Buddhist village in the entire Kullu valley, where my god-family lived. A timeless idyll.

Occupation came in an unexpected way. A gaddi camp was passing by, planning to camp a little higher than the pasture we were in. I recognised the shepherd, and invited him for a cup of tea. When he saw me, he decided to camp near our camp itself.

Over a cup of tea, I realized why.

A filly of his, had been attacked by a bear a week ago, and had been hurt badly. Originally, believing that she would die anyway, he hadn’t taken her to a vet. But she hadn’t yet died. She was in a bad way, with her wounds infected, and was struggling to keep up with the moving camp, to follow her mother. This was creating a problem, as the mare used to keep waiting for her, and slowing the caravan.

I had already gained a solid reputation as an animal lover, and my animals were often a point of interet for local livestock owners for the glowing condition I used to maintain them in. Plus, I was gaining a reputation as an enthusiastic “unofficial vet” from the knowledge of animal medicine I used to gather for the well-being of my horses in a land where vets were not easily available, and often very far from the place of need.

He wanted me to take a look at the filly and see if there was any hope for her, as well as see if she could be put down, if there wasn’t. I refused flat out to put her down, as I am not of the opinion that animals should be killed when they are fighting to recover. Plus I lacked the kind of knowledge and equipment it would take to put her down. I agreed to take a look and see what I could do for her.

We went out into the pasture and unloaded his horses to set up camp and then look for the filly. She was in a bad way. She was sleeping, exhausted at the end of the pasture without even coming to join the herd, once she saw that they had halted.

We got her up and brought her up to my tent and tied her in front of it. I started to take a good look at her and see what it was that I was up against.

She was a beautiful, black filly. Three months old, lovely conformation - she would have made a fine mare when she grew up, if she survived this scenario. Her rump and neck was covered with deep gashes from the bear’s claws, and a week of neglect had allowed infection to settle in. Most of the gashes had developed pus, and a couple had maggots in them. My whole being recoiled at the thought of having to clean up this mess.

If I had to save this filly, I had to do it, no matter how repulsive it was. I felt a surge of anger at the shepherd for neglecting her treatment like that, and vented my fury in choice words, yelling at him and his wife for being callous to the very animals that made their livelihood possible.

The filly stood there shivering from the early morning air and her exhaustion.

I made the couple promise to rest in the pasture for at least a week, before I would touch the filly - it was pointless to begin something, if it wouldn’t be sustained. As an incentive, I praised the quality of the filly, and asserted that she would become a very valuable animal and bring him good money and work very well, if she was helped to recover. This seemed to strike a note of interest.

I had some anitbiotic injections in my animal first-aid kit. I gave her a shot. She hardly noticed. Then I knew, that I had to get over my nausea and actually deal with those wounds, and took a look at my medical supplies. They were minimal. The anti-septic I had, would hardly deal with half the wounds she had before running out. The same with the creams. Now what? I shoved the supplies back into my sack, and kept only the bottle of phenyl. The rest would have to be home remidies (which was what I preferred in any case).

I made a strong solution of tea in a huge pot and used that to clean the wounds. Yes, I just plunged in, and cleaned them all thoroughly, pus, maggots and all, till the flesh showed clean. Some of the deeper wounds still harboured maggots - of that, I was sure, so I used some gauze soaked in phenyle on them to dress them. On the rest, I applied a light film of honey and stuffed them full with crushed garlic.

All done, I walked away from the tent area and puked.

The evening saw a repeat performance. On the next day, the maggot wounds were clean too, and they received the honey and garlic treatment, and by that evening, some of the lighter cuts had begun to heal, and the filly was acting more interested in life, and giving me trouble to catch for treatment But she seemed to understand that I was trying to help, so she flinched and nudged with her nose, if it hurt, but never tried to kick at me or hurt me in any way.

After that, I taught the couple how to do what I was doing, and told them that they would have to repeat this till ALL the wounds were healed, and that the filly could probably begin walking in a day or two.

They seemed to have got the point, and the two days were uneventful - so to say (not counting one of my fillies who seemed to be jealous of all the attention this one was getting)

The time was up, and the gaddi camp moved on, and the filly became another memory, until a few years later, when I ran across the same gaddi again. There was a beautiful mare in his herd - the one I had treated. I recognised her instantly and was happy for her. The couple put camp once more, to spend some time with me, and that evening, I was invited to a special dinner, where they thanked me with tears in their eyes for saving their beautiful mare.

Their animals also looked better cared for, since the last time. I was happy, that things had worked out well, and that they had developed some love and concern for the living factors in their “business”